1. How to Regulate Anxiety
Anxiety and panic can certainly hit hard sometimes. The heart races, the chest tightens, and the mind races to find what is wrong, this can leave us feeling unsettled. Naturally, the instinct is to push this experience away, to get control fast. How could we not? Its unpleasant. Yet sometimes the most powerful response is to stop running from it and ask, What is this really about?
Anxiety is not always the problem itself. Sometimes it is a messenger, drawing our attention to emotions buried underneath such as grief we have never fully mourned, guilt we want to avoid, anger we have had to suppress, or desire we have not dared to feel. When those feelings are too raw to face, anxiety rises in their place like an alarm, sounding out to something within us that needs attention.
When anxiety becomes too high, it can blur our thinking or make us feel detached, tense, or unwell. The key is to notice it early and help the body settle so emotions can surface safely. Sometimes, beneath chronic worry, there might be a sadness that was never quite safe to express.
If anxiety rises too high, simple ways to regulate can help the body return to balance. You might slow your breathing, relax your shoulders, or gently name what you feel in your body. One powerful technique is the physiological sigh, taking two short inhales through the nose, followed by a long exhale through the mouth. This helps release tension and activates the body’s calming response.
It is important to remember that regulation is not always the answer. When anxiety is at a mild or manageable level, that is often the moment to stay curious rather than soothe. Notice what is happening in your body, the tension, flutter, or pressure, and allow the underlying emotions to emerge. At the same time, be mindful of thoughts that try to pull you away from the feeling such as worry, rumination, self-criticism, or rationalisation. These are often quiet habits that keep us from fully feeling what is underneath. Gently block or set those thoughts aside and return your attention to the body. By noticing body sensations and allowing the underlying emotions to emerge, you begin to understand what the anxiety is signalling rather than simply quieting it. If it feels difficult to identify what emotion is present, it can help to ask yourself, What might someone in my position be feeling right now? This gentle question can open space for awareness and help you find language for what is unfolding inside.
When anxiety feels confusing or relentless, it can help to explore it with someone who can listen and guide the process. Therapy is not about fixing but about slowing down enough to listen. In a safe and steady space, anxiety can begin to reveal what it has been holding, the emotions, needs, and truths that have waited to be seen. Through this process, lasting relief grows from understanding rather than control.